On The Eve Of A Race

So I have been through many races in my life, multiple marathons, a crazy amount of half marathon races or races just under marathon distance but, never have I truly ever entered the realm of the ultra distance trail races. I’ve ran a fare share of long trail runs upwards of 30 miles, but that was at leasure and without time constraints or other runners trying to run my ass down. This beast is a timed ultra with a 6 hour time limit, run what you can in 6 hours and let’s see how far you’ve ran and then we’ll see how that compares with what everybody else has run, bam!

I’ve trained my butt off for this, I’m ready for this and after a two week taper and two days off from running my legs are going friggin crazy! I don’t know what to expect from the race or from myself, the fear and anxiety I’m experiencing is obviously the normal self doubt that comes with racing, but the fear of how the weather will be, how will the trail be, will my legs hold up? So many things are going through my mind, so many fears, so many contradictions about my own abilities are flooding my brain. I can’t even be comfortable with my selection for all the crud going into my one allowed drop bag, ugh!

My body is even conspiring against me at the moment sending phantom knee pains to my brain, obviously aware of the punishment I will soon force on my body, silly body like it has a choice. The self doubt is the worst part of all of it, questioning the training, my body, questioning my mind and my resolve. I spend every moment picturing the trail in my mind, picturing myself cruising through the trees, my breath is steady and my footfalls are awkward as my foot landings adjust to the terrain, the air and the odors inject every molecule into my lungs, I can’t keep smiling, God I love racing!!!!

Tomorrow will come, the race will come and I will toe the line….and then I will crush it!

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